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I started with a criminal record for petty narcotics pos and a 'computer tresspassing' record guaranteeing me unemployment almost everywhere except manual labor. I was also living in a SRO in the worst area you can ever imagine, had no money, huge debt and couldn't even finish university so washed out in the second year due to poverty.
STEP 1 - GET A FUCKING JOB
Any job will do. Some shitty manual labor position is great because then you also get some activity in so you aren't a fat bastard.
Easy jobs to get are landscaping (usually pays under the table cash), construction clean up, warehouse, or whatever you can find on your local Craigslist 'gigs' section. Alternatively there's the dreaded nightshift tech support. Look around for these on CL, or move to somewhere in your country where the jobs are. In Canada this means terribad mining and oilfiend work but it pays like $40/hr and there's nothing else to do up there, perfect for studying.
For me, I got a job at the post office and delivered mail, which meant I got off early and had lot's of time for school. Also consider institutions that will pay you to learn a trade, such as telephone companies and whatever else.
STEP 2 - START SAVING MONEY
Basic income budget rule is 70/20/10
70% of your money goes to rent, food, clothing, your essentials.
20% goes to short term savings, like buying a multi core box with 32G+ ram for compiling programs (we'll get to this later)
10% goes to long term savings, like hookers in Thailand, emergency savings if you're ever laid off, I dunno.
To accomplish this I simply log into online banking after I'm paid and just move 30% of the money out of my account to savings like clockwork to prevent me blowing it on bullshit and impulse garbage.
STEP 3 - GET A CREDIT CARD BUT NEVER GO INTO DEBT
Use this card for everything like groceries, gas whatever. Always, ALWAYS pay off the entire amount at the end of the month. This builds your credit to god like levels. You will need this later when you launch your own startup and need funding.
STEP 4 - TAKE FREE ONLINE SCHOOL
http://www.khanacademy.org/ - retake Grade 11/12 math and make sure you're solid in algorithms and precalculus. They're only a few minute long lectures that's all you need. Physics are also online.
http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/#electrical-engineering-and-computer-science Take some of these courses, follow a plan like the one's laid out for regular students: http://www.eecs.mit.edu/academics-admissions/undergraduate-programs
I took 6-3 and a few 6-2 courses, the one's I could do without needing physical access to a lab. You considerably shorten the time it takes to finish these courses from a regular student. I would get off work @ 2pm, make some food and stream a lecture while eating it. Afterwards I'd do the assigned work. Then I'd fuck around with whatever, and do another lecture. Then go hang out with my girl. I did this everyday M-Friday while working. Weekends I took off.
Regular university they split up classes 2x a week or 3x a week, you're doing it 2x a day and will blast through it in less than a few weeks, forget entire semesters. IF YOU DO THE WORK/LABS ASSIGNED, YOU WON'T FORGET THE MATERIAL.
Keep doing this and progress through the courses until you have basically given yourself an undergraduate degree in Eng/CompSci.
STEP 5 - BUILD A PORTFOLIO
Now you have the knowledge, prove it to people. Start a security blog/status.net and write about whatever 0-day hacks you found in the Android source code. Write about game theory, contribute to the Tor project, or just contract yourself out to build websites for clients.
In my case I would modify AOSP for security, build it with SEandroid and sold my own devices. This is where your multi core 32G+ Ram box comes in handy because building AOSP takes forever otherwise. I created ultra secure handsets and sold them on craigslist probably to drug dealers, but nevertheless no longer needed to do my old job anymore.
STEP 6 - EITHER GET A $70k+ ENTRY JOB CODING WITH YOUR PORTFOLIO AND SKILLZ, OR START YOUR OWN COMPANY
The problem with coding F/T for a startup is that they will overwork you to death to push out their release and often never pay any overtime or extra benefits. You also have to do fucking queer team bulding corporate society faggot tree. Possibly, MAYBE if the company is bought out you may see some share profits but unlikely. More likely they will buy the company, screw you and move the coding to India or Ireland or somewhere else leaving you unemployed. You'll also have to contribute serious time to some other guy's project so he can make millions. If you're going to work that much, be your own boss.
If you want to startup your own company this is where your platinum credit rating comes in handy. Nobody will turn you down for funding. Startup any bullshit cloud application or anything to do with the medical/heath industry such as adapting CryptDB to a product that can be used for medical offices or other sensitive data. Build it up and shop it for a takeover, you will sell your company quickly.
STEP ???? - PROFIT
Now you have money from your sold startup, saved money from all your work either bulding sites or whatever you decided to do, and a platinum credit rating. You're ready to bankroll your own startup something you can truly 100% own and build from scratch however you want. Maybe you want to bankroll an open source project and don't care about the money because you already have enough from selling your last company. Maybe you want to design and build your own handsets and the operating system that they come with (because the AOSP kernel is fucking ridiculously huge and full of bugs)
- But I must have a piece of paper from a recognized University!
No coding or startup looking for partners gives a fuck about paper, they care about proof like portfolios and demonstrations. Moxie Marlinspike has zero post secondary and sold his mobile security project to Twitter for a shitload of money, and now even works for them on a contract basis. No paper.
- I want to be a doctor can I do it online for free?
Fuck no obviously. But you can take most of the required courses online for free then go apply directly into second year, once again showing them proof you know what you're doing through demonstration/auditing courses.
- Can I get some sort of certs for all this?
If you must, stanford university offers certs for their online courses. Can always pay for all those bullshit online security certs as well.
The business I started for myself (after I sold the other one) is awesome and I hardly have to work since most of it is automated. I don't do any 'team building events', I don't have to worry about release dealines and dealing with slipshod coworker code, I don't have to answer to anybody (even my customers I don't have to answer to, my software is sold as-is and there's never been any problems, esp no security problems from all the proper coding I learned from 6-3 courses) and the way I've set it up I don't even have to offer customer support since I built it correctly the first time so any idiot can use it.
No reason you can't do this too. Do you have 2 years to spare? Good 2go.
I approve of this post. Thank you for the free education links.
Here's another one, the stanford links:
They give you actuall certs for completing some of them, like the crypto courses.
Seriously fuck corporate school, fuck going into debt just to get a piece of paper and spend all your time boning sluts at the student union pub. You can do this by going to any regular bar
Derp, I also forget the updated course lectures. Look up the course number you want to take, there will be vids on mit site of the most recent 2012 courses just check the course calendar all the links will be there.
If they aren't, check the 2011 links. That's how I did the Network Security 2011 course, a course MIT charges like $12,000 for.
so how was it you "take" 6.3 and 6.2? i see the intro classes have the lectures and assignments which is awesome bc its just like youre taking the classs, but most of the classes in 6.3 and 6.2 dont have lectures or instruction that i can find i dont understand how to learn the material with just the assignments and or tests.
this is reallly exiting but i dont know how to teach myself outside of the few classes that are the "scholar" classes
Can you provide more detail on starting a company and selling it?
That was a great success story, OP, but I'm broke as fuck.
This deserves a fucking sticky.
To reiterate what this person said, I think we should make a sticky linking to a Pastebin with all "10/10 quality" /jew/ posts.
a foreign language is all you need. not in america ofc.
For some reason I got really aroused reading all that shit I didn't understand.
I commend OP for his success and determination. But let's face it: you have to have--at least--some talent to actually come up with some sort of innovative software design that 1) works and 2) sells. Most people can't even get around the coding part, so everything else is useless. Also, for people that just don't have natural talent for coding, mathematics etc. then clearly this "method" is going to fail after step 5 or so.
Anyway, bump because there might be people out there who will actually profit from this. IN the mean time, I'll stick to my wage slave road (;_;).
well written post, good links, very encouraging - thanks for taking the time to write this up OP
This is a great idea
Fucking. Thank you. Based OP.
You inspired me to do something with my life.
Just one question, how long did all of this take for you to do?
Best OP Ever!!
Just popping in to say thanks.
I myself am a uni student and know most of this shit, but sadly suck at coding.
So thanks, OP, now I know what to do next.
B-but there are no jobs I can do ;_;
So why do I need steps 4 and 5 if at the end I need to start a company anyway?
College student here going for a Business Major, mad props OP.
Even though I live in a lower-middle class family I still had to work my ass off to make money because that's what my parents did and they didn't raise no fucking leech.
If you're in a tropical state ( Florida in my case) then the premier manual labor job to get here is landscaping. Get a job with your city ( I did and so far it's paying enough for me to cover my gas and food expenses), find a university or college ( they normally pay the most, especially if it's a private college), or if you have the money start your own landscaping service and go to the classiest neighborhood you can find and mow rich old people's yards( there's a FUCKLOAD of rich old people here so bully for me!)
You will get experience, exercise, and more importantly, money! Sure it may not be what you want to do with your life, but it will give you experience and something you can put on a resume.
There are jobs out there for you, the question is if you want to take the time to look for one.
OP is an alpha.
I have a similar story but I was a shit cunt that wasted 10 years of my life not to drugs or crime but just doing nothing, like a drifter.
Now that I've picked up myself, I am pretty much following the save money then get education route, and am now going to be a Financial trader/analyst/adviser.
Whatever deep shit you're in, just need to pick yourself up and change, I can assure you that you didn't waste 10 years of your life like I did.
This is the greatest thread ever OP. Is there a way to reach you? E-Mail?
>>444 What this niggeh said. Not only should this thread get a sticky, it should also be gold plated.
Why the he'll is this on page 3
Seconding that sticky request
Saw this thread on 4Chan's /b/ the other day. Really good advice thread, I must say.
You're just going to die anyway so what's the point? Why not just kill myself today and avoid all the work and stress?
I've been an English professor and I've been a landscaper, and I would not say that landscaper is worse! Being active is great, also, following the rhythm of day and night (not going to bed at 3AM), and feeling the seasons pass, sleeping soundly coz you got exercise. . . . I'd get up at 5, be doing some labor by 7 AM, get home at different times, take a nap, be fresh for the evening. . . . Sitting on your ass (literally on your buttocks) for half of your life is itself a degraded quality of life.
Thank you for posting this. However, I'm still not sure which of these class I should or should not take. Is there a concise list of all the courses relevant to what the OP was talking about?
I am sure that the uni has one.
screen capped the shit outta this. This REQUIRES a sticky
????/10 post OP!
Coming back here after a while, that was my post and this is still freaking amazing!!
STEP ONE, GET A JOB YOU USELESS FUCK
The end of this post should say:
Are you happy with what you are doing?
Keep doing it
Learn to do something else
Kinda stupid advice.
Not everything you are happy to do would earn you money or would be profitable. Especially if you are trying to not be a poorfag. Shitty and routine job is probably not what would make you happy. You just have to get over it and do what you like in the meantime. Or when you have enough shekels to not give a fuck.
I'm curious learning more about this AOSP stuff, as well as SEandroid.
What are some good resources to learn more about this?
whoops. not op. =x
COME ON YOU PUSSY MAN UP PULL YOURSELF UP BY YOUR BOOTSTRAPS BE A REAL MAN MAAAN UP BE ALPHA SAY WORDS LIKE FUCK AND SHIT A LOT
Waving your big dick around is not advice
Coursera.org now has hundreds of free courses from Algorithms to Discrete Math. If you want to learn how to code properly take MIT 6.001 SICP course. It will take a few months but is well worth it.
There's also codeacademy, udacity and many other free univ classes popping up. Just read a post on HN other day about a homeless guy who taught himself how to build apps http://nypost.com/2013/12/11/homeless-man-learns-to-code-releases-app/
Granted some guy helped him but coding is easy if you take SICP course. All materials are free for it. If you don't like coding do it anyways just to get easy income because thousands of jobs avail. Save your money and go to university to take whatever you want or do your art/music on the side. Nobody is going to help you, you can only help yourself.
going through berkeley's data structures course. started yesterday and i'm on lecture 10
Here is exactly what I did:
First, math. Starting with Pre-Calculus a decent refresher on shit you forgot in highschool, or maybe haven't taken yet. It's easy. https://www.coursera.org/course/precalculus
More math. We need to take Calculus 18.01 or any single variable calculus course so you learn about differential equations. You will use these to refine code you come across in the wild, the first thing I do is look for differential equations the orig software author didn't solve and solve them. Now I've just optimized the fuck out of the program. http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/mathematics/18-01-single-variable-calculus-fall-2006/
More math again! Now that we have a solid calculus background time to learn Math for Computer Science. It's easy, actually. http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-042j-mathematics-for-computer-science-fall-2010/
You just need pre-calc to start, then can take any programming class at the same time as doing 18.01 or 6.042
Now let's learn to code.
SICP, is the only choice here. Remember you are learning to code, language doesn't matter. Scheme has no syntax really and you spend the whole time learning about functional programming. You will need this course later for Scala, and it's the best course ever designed. Every sentence matters, every assignment is important so do everything. http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-001-structure-and-interpretation-of-computer-programs-spring-2005/ Those Sussman video lectures are awesome too.
Now you have a real, solid fundamentals of computer science. So let's learn a language you will actually use IRL
Scala complete functional programming course:
https://www.coursera.org/course/progfun note how it lists SICP as a recommended prereq or to learn more about concepts taught in this course.
Take the second Scala course
I also took 6.005 Elements of Software Construction for Android app building, with scala back ends. http://stellar.mit.edu/S/course/6/ all the lecture notes, reading materials, slides and tests are there for the 2013 class. Probably the best course that exists for "industry" programming though you've already done most of this course in SICP and Scala but lecture notes on version controls, debugging and GUI were awesome.
Congrats you're now a software engineer and you paid $0.00 to get this education, so long as you completed all assignments (the more you code the better) and understood the material. You can get a jr. software dev position anywhere just show them your git or hg repository full of all the software you made for these classes, and shit you made on your own. Starting wages for a zero experience Scala dev is $70/hr
Thanks for the story OP, it's nice to know what's possible. I've been trying to sort my life out for years but just can't manage. You've inspired me to keep trying.
I'm in the UK, can I still use these websites to get certs or should I look for British alternatives? I have a Canadian passport since my mum was a citizen when I was born if that helps.
I've wasted 10 years too, I really need to get something done.
I dunno what the fucks wrong with me, I'm pretty smart but also an idiot. Like I'm really good at picking things up effortlessly; be it sports, music or computers.
The problem is, as soon as I get good at something I just get bored and drop it after a while. Like I went to college at 15 to do IT, it was too easy so I dropped out. I also have done the same with Digital media and I got into uni and wasted my chance at a sound engineering degree.
Same with jobs, I've done web design, programming & administration/security before when I was 16/17. I've done banking and mortgage advisory, worked in PR, done stunt work for films, bar tending/catering, DJ'd in a nightclub for a year & made music.
Now I'm 25 with no qualifications and the most unbelievable erratic CV ever. No one will hire me for shit because it shows that I never do one thing for long. So I'm poor as fuck and annoyed that I can't seem to make anything last.
Thanks again for the links and the ideas.
You've got to be fucking kidding, is that you Walter Mitty??
, NEET slogan.png
>STEP 1 - GET A FUCKING JOB
how are the chances to start your own company with a degree in economoics ?
I have a problem...my best talent is writing (wining some contests included) and communicating with people, I've also worked as a succesful comercial in the middle of a mental illness and I managed to close a contract every day (shit was tought nonetheless). These are my skills but I don't find any course that is related to them in the pages.
Do you know some page where I can find any free courses related to this? I don't trust corporated systems of teaching and I'm tired of begging money from my parents.
Plz help an anon to form and be successful
Lot's of new resources now.
This is a sequence of courses put together to teach you modern web dev. It concentrates on theory and python/django instead of rails but you can easily learn ruby after you learn python.
This teaches you C, and you make your own c-like Lisp.
This teaches you modern computer architecture. It was developed by an IRL jew at an Israeli university because too many CS grads he met didn't know anything about computer arch. Prob one of the best courses I've taken, you just need to know some basic programming from any Comp 101 class or SICP book.
For $45, you subscribe for a year to this Android book that teaches everything there is to know about Android.
For Math, I've found the best books are one's done by Sheldon Axler (omg another jew!) both his PreCalculus Book and his book "Linear Algerbrae done right" are the best books I've ever read about math. There is a huge push right now to restructure Math classes in North America since we've never actually been taught math. You spend all of highschool learning pointless Trig calculations you never fully understand. His calculus book actually teaches you what real math is, same with the algebrae book.
Of course you don't need math to program, but it helps.
Writing the only resources I know about is to read all of George Orwell's advice https://www.mtholyoke.edu/acad/intrel/orwell46.htm note the 6 "rules for writers" at the end of that essay. Live by those and you should be fine.
Christopher Hitchens also has a lot of workshops he filmed talking about writing for a living. His advice is "if you feel you NEED to write, instead of want to write, then you'll do OK".
okay op good post very informative and motivating
what i dont get is the hate for ireland. I didnt think ireland was consodered code monkey standard
Taxes there are low, so many companies outsource there.
bumping because i want to read this later and dont want 404
>STEP 5 - BUILD A PORTFOLIO
>Now you have the knowledge, prove it to >people. Start a security blog/status.net >and write about whatever 0-day hacks you >found in the Android source code. Write >about game theory, contribute to the Tor >project, or just contract yourself out to >build websites for clients.
>In my case I would modify AOSP for >security, build it with SEandroid and sold >my own devices. This is where your multi >core 32G+ Ram box comes in handy because >building AOSP takes forever otherwise. I >created ultra secure handsets and sold >them on craigslist probably to drug >dealers, but nevertheless no longer needed >to do my old job anymore.
Could somebody go into more detail on building a portfolio? Preferably on the AOSP part? I tried Google but couldn't gind anything really except official Android updates
I can't greentext im sorry ahahh
its a sticky you tard, not to mention threads hardly ever 404 on /jew/
Damn son, this got me more motivated than anything I've done in the last couple of years as a community college student studying CompSci. Watching a lecture on Computer Science Math right now.
Another important piece of advice: lie to your interviewers. Say that you have more skills than you do (easy to do if it's a techie skill that they don't know), and also (I just thought of this after reading the OP) if you've had long periods of unemployment say you've been doing small time gigs like landscaping, it will make you more employable.
>the AOSP kernel is fucking ridiculously huge and full of bugs
You mean Linux? Because in all this time reading source code, I've never seen those "bugs" you are claiming AOSP is full of, can you explain better what you mean?
So basically I'm taking the Step one... working everyday for 10 hours a day. I tried to get a mining/oil related job but I had no success whatsoever. Where is the boomtown?
, business ness.jpg
Holy shit man! This is like a guide on how to succeed in life if you fucked up.
I've been programming for 6 years, first learning by myself, then in Uni. I can honestly say I'm in the top 5-10% range of programmers skill-wise.
Yeah... You won't make 70k$ your first year with an online degree. Even people with Masters in CS generally make on ~50-60k$ their first year on the job market.
It takes about 10 undergrad courses to get a basic understanding of software development and at least 1-2 years MINIUMUM of experience to not be complete shit at it.
It's true you don't NEED a paper, however you need to be either crazily smart or really lucky to get a great idea you can sell.
There's about 3-4% of startups that work alright, 1% of those get bought for huge sums of money.
If you guys want the real fucking steps:
-Get degree online while working freelance part-time.
-Work for a decent size company for a good 4 years.
-Do what the fuck you want.
You should be able to make a living with freelancing then around 35-45k$/y growing by ~5k$/y.
After a good 4 years you'll be making ~60k$/y and on your way to better things.
After 4-6 years you can become Senior Developer, usually comes with a 10k$ bump.
Generally, software developer salaries stop at around 80-90k$, unless you're a specialist or you go on to a Leadership position (Senior Team Leaders can make upwards of 120k$/y).
BTW, learning about new programming languages is secondary to the basic ones (Java and C/C++). If you don't know Java, no Techy HR rep worth his salt is gonna hire you for a Scala job...
Why work when you can get a decent amount from autismbux + huge benefits from free housing to free transport fees?
You can even save up enough to buy nice things or go on a holiday with your girlfriend or whatever.
Cross posting something to do with freelance
>Freelance work is awful in my opinion as you'll be competing with Indians who'll work for pennies and who know more than you because they spend their whole life writing code just to survive. Ruby and Node.js are in right now though.
Go over anxietybux for me?
In my case I have no income, and yet I am Ph D. says on record that I have got epilepsy and depression mood disorder.
How to autismvux or anxietybux?
Dumpster Diving and Computer Programming 101
it's been 2 years.. has anyone made something of themselves?
Nah, because ever since this board began and I saw this post I realized I'm truly just lazy. I'd rather just browse the net aimlessly then work.
I understand that its just me being stubborn but I don't really care enough to do anything about it.
maybe you could use a dose of psychotherapy...
Where are all the oil jobs?
Oil tanked dude. A year ago. Shit's gonna be dead for awhile.
That's the world we live in though, jump in whatever can make you money and when the pond dries up just move on ASAP instead of lamenting.
Should I sell my vidya/movie/book/toy collection for a jump start?
Guys dont worry about it. Most programmers are either indians or wannabes. They suck either way.
on Coursera.org, do you have to enroll in the courses? Or are the materials available to everyone so you can just start when you want and go at your own pace?
is there a program that does this or do you just enjoy using photoshop?
Depends on the course. Some are open all year long, others are programmed to take place during specific periods of the year.
Programming is over rated. People form India will under cut your ass.
Also it depends on what type of programming you are going for.
Also Also doing front end web design (just html and css) doesn't pay that well.
Hell, if you just get your A+ cert that can open tech jobs such as working as a computer or network tech for a factory, warehouse, etc (depending on where you live)
Fuck I have a friend that makes $17 an hour working for Apple at home doing tech support and they provide you with all the stuff you need and help if your internet bill + discounts + benefits.
I don't want to do fucking computer science shit. I don't want to do fucking programming. There's got to be another way. I'm tired of the fucking "programmers make big bux d00d!" meme.
There's no way in hell I'm ever working with anything related to programming either.
What the hell else could I do, though?
I have a simple job now but it gives me no valuable experience and I have no chance of getting something else. I'd barely get by if I didn't still live with my mom.
failed at step 2.
Spent all money on hookers.
Best thread OP
This instant I want to change my dull life
Other than programming, I'd like to be in agriculture because without food, everyone will be starving.
I'd like to move somewhere else but the money will never be enough because of the weak currency. Is there any cheat sheet to become an immigrant that will work and get a job somewhere in first world?
>my country is no war zone, it just corrupted, even it's democracy but it doesn't look like one because cronies
>jobs are filled with other cheaper immigrant labors that locals can't even compete because these immigrants requires lowest wage with high skills
my savings is 500 in my currency and about 113 USD. (it used to be 3 to 1 USD in 2014). No NEET programs here unlike in first world.
Good wage other than programming?
How to move out the country with no money?
I don't know who you are op, but im going to give it a try. I saved the text from this thread like 4 years ago and got lazy from having a decent job and gave up on programming, but im about to kill it and wanted to say thanks
Me and you anon, we're both going to do this. I came across this chan/thread about 2 years ago by chance and it's time to get off my lazy ass and actually DO IT. I started relearning algebra 2 yesterday, once I have it I'm going to learn pre calculus (I did shit at it in high school) and learn to program concurrently. I will report on my progress in 2 years and let you all know what I've accomplished. Thank you OP, to quote /fit/ WE'RE GONNA MAKE IT!
Glad to see the button work
thanks for sharing this op
shame i'm a fucking idiot though
This thread makes me wonder whether or not I should just drop out of life and become a hobo
In a job interview for an entry level job like fast food how do I explain a long 8-10 year gap without working? I never got a job because I had horrible anxiety with minor autism and I couldn't deal with the pressure of job interviews. I know this isn't a good excuse but that's the truth. Do I tell them the truth?
sounds like you qualify for autismbux/anxietybux buckaroo