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Anonymous 16/08/21(Sun)18:59 No. 24625 ID: e97db8

This needs a bump back to page one.

Also would love to see Sara get knocked up at the end of this


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Anonymous 16/08/24(Wed)01:46 No. 24629 ID: 07f23c

>>24625
>knocked up
She's eleven. She's still flat-chested, and it's all but outright stated that she hasn't had her first period yet, either.

Unless the author's going to do a timeskip of several years, getting Sara pregnant would be unrealistic and generally a bad idea.


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OP!!L1ZTV3LGZl 16/08/24(Wed)09:31 No. 24631 ID: 6683c5

>>24625

"Hey, my 11 year old sister is suddenly pregnant and you're the only dude around. You, uh, wouldn't know anything about it, would you?"

*protagonist dives through a window, suffering severe lacerations in the process, rolls to his feet, and takes off running for the countryside*

".... that didn't answer my question."


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Anonymous 16/08/24(Wed)09:55 No. 24632 ID: 145cba

No no no . No time travel. You add time travel and this whole god-damed so perfect of a story becomes the book " The Door Into Summer" by Robert A. Heinlein. Granted I love his work in sci-if but roommates is so much More than that!


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Anonymous 16/08/24(Wed)20:52 No. 24634 ID: 4e3ab2

>>24631
is this canon now? xD


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Anonymous 16/08/25(Thu)03:28 No. 24635 ID: 224a77

We need more content in this thread!


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OP!!L1ZTV3LGZl 16/08/26(Fri)04:56 No. 24641 ID: 6683c5

>>24632

>confused feelings when someone compares your story about a college student molesting a prepubescent girl to Robert Heinlein, one of the most inspirational sci-fi authors of all time

On the one hand, it's flattering as hell. On the other hand, Heinlein was into some weird shit. Time Enough For Love was too much for me. Like, fucking your own opposite-gender underage clone? Going back in time and fucking your mother while she's pregnant with you? Nope! The farthest I'll go is a dude jizzing in a little girl's mouth, that's far enough for me, thanks.

>>24635

I'm working on it. I mostly write new chapters when I'm bored/feel the urge, so I gotta be in the right mood. Also, people are complaining that it's repetitive, which unfortunately is a necessary evil at this stage. I bet that by the time they're having sex on a regular basis, people will be complaining that, "ho hum, they're having sex again, so repetitive". Kinda kills my motivation to write, especially if most of the sexual activity going on in the immediate future consists of blowjobs and such before they move on to the next stage in their relationship.


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OP!!L1ZTV3LGZl 16/08/26(Fri)04:59 No. 24642 ID: 6683c5

>>24641

I mean, when you were in high school, did you complain about how 'repetitive' it was if your girlfriend sucked your dick twice a week? Hell no, you came and you asked for another.

So if you're whacking off to this story like most people, what the hell are you complaining about? Sex scenes are sex scenes, they're not necessarily where most of the character and story development come from.


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Anonymous 16/08/26(Fri)05:39 No. 24643 ID: 0cf92e

>>24642
Problem is, this thread's been up for FOUR FUCKING YEARS at this point. What you write is good, but it's just too fucking slow.
Also, don't get snippy because people are criticising you. Be glad that there are people who care enough about your self-indulgent amateur pedo fapfiction to complain about the bits they don't like, in the hopes that it'll improve.

The absolute worst thing you can do is get arrogant and believe that your story is perfect and anybody who says otherwise is wrong. No story is ever perfect, every work of fiction has flaws and every writer has areas they can improve in, even if they've been writing for fifty goddamn years and won ALL the awards.

And you're goddamn right people will complain when they're going steady, because this is the fucking internet and people will complain about anything.


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Anonymous 16/08/26(Fri)08:25 No. 24644 ID: a886ca

>>24643
While I don't agree with how this guy went about it, his message is sincere and valid. Obviously you're doing this for free and we have no control over how you write it, however when the people who presumably have been reading your shit for the aforementioned years you've been writing it, it's probably not just to shit on you.

Sure, everything you've written so far has been a joy to read and fap to, no questions asked, but if you asked me "Would you prefer we do another blowjob chapter or one where we advance the sexual relationship?" I'm gonna go for the second, just like how if a guy was asked by his girlfriend if he wants another blowjob or does he wanna go all the way tonight, of course the motherfucker loved that blowjob. If it was the choice between blowjob or nothing of fucking course the guy would love to keep getting the blowjob. But between the blowjob and something new? Different story.

If it was up to the guy he'd be doing anal already. We naturally want more, want it to go farther, etc etc, are we gonna say "GIVE US VAGINAL SEX OR STOP WRITING" of course not, we're not retarded but if you wanna know what would make us even happier, we're telling ya. Are we gonna be happy with whatever you put out? Yeah if you keep up the quality you've been doing and it doesn't seem like you're suddenly gonna go to shit, we're gonna like it.


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Storyteller95 16/08/26(Fri)10:36 No. 24645 ID: b1488a

Unlike some other posters I'm not going to be an ass about it but I really hope that contrary to your early post you will eventually go further than him jizzing in her mouth. Take your own time getting there though as the long as the quality keeps being top notch. I'm sure there are people out there who think MY pacing between sex scenes is glacial.


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Ride the walrus. Anonymous coward 16/08/26(Fri)18:13 No. 24648 ID: 4d7ccb

I cant disgree with above posters, LTReader, FTPoster. Comments like above are devoted readers venting re lack of progression of story. We love it and love wot u write. We sometimes check for updates daily . . . I'd love to see how many hits this page gets daily. </end rants>


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OP!!L1ZTV3LGZl 16/08/28(Sun)06:40 No. 24653 ID: 6683c5

>>24645

Oh, this train has a long way to go before the end of the line. I'm just making the pacing conform to realism and character development rather than something like this:

http://oglaf.com/perhaps/

http://oglaf.com/perhaps/2/

But anyway, since I'm only in moderate pain now and no longer medicated out the ass, I figure updates will occur more often and we can proceed at a somewhat faster pace.


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Anonymous 16/08/28(Sun)09:11 No. 24654 ID: 145cba

As long as the story is in liner intime I have no problem with it. It is realistic as far as the time frame goes, I mean honestly if he pushes it now she might not trust enough for more deeper context and content as the story progresses. And it's cute. Girls that age worry about image and love ,etc ,etc. And I'm at
Least 98% sure she knows the whole vitamin stick ( lame pun) is false provided this story is not in 1972 before computers. For real what kid does not have a smart phone and google these days. I have been watch this story for years...OP keep up the great work. As an ass man I know the value of waiting for something good.


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Anonymous 16/08/29(Mon)10:45 No. 24655 ID: 58c98a

>>24653
Cool story bro. Seriously, had a great time reading.


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styxarcher 16/09/01(Thu)10:00 No. 24659 ID: fe010e

>>24653
I'm wondering how long does it take you to write a chapter? With editing and the like.


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Anonymous 16/09/01(Thu)22:17 No. 24660 ID: 30ae27

Excellent story -- always worth the wait!


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Anonymous 16/09/06(Tue)05:28 No. 24665 ID: 7b76a4

Im dying for an update op!


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Anonymous 16/09/18(Sun)21:50 No. 24680 ID: 5a335c

>>24653


This, dear OP, http://oglaf.com/blank-page/
comes to mind...



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